Pune and Punatics

Punatics, the people of the city of Pune, India, are as a rule proud, no-nonsense and steeped in culture and history. And we hate living anywhere else. The average Punatic will complain about the ridiculous state of the roads, debate on whether the local public transport service can indeed be called a service, bemoan the exponentially rising land prices, grieve the continuously shrinking green-cover, nostalgically hark back the days when it was a haven for the superannuated, but will refuse to migrate. (And will always believe that their obvious showing-off of verbal "skills" will go unnoticed, and at the same time hope that it will be appreciated too, but more on that somewhere else).

There are much better sources for gauging just how crazy we are about our hometown (P. L. "PuLa" Deshpande's is definitely the most celebrated one), but I will have a go nonetheless. You see, despite both my parents being born and brought up here, my Punacy has been a hard-earned one, since I was dropped 400 km south (as the stork flies) in Belgaum, in the neighbouring state of Karnataka. It took me a few years to get to my hometown, and a further few more before being accepted as certifiable. I certainly feel that I may be able to provide some insider info...

There are quite a few good things that Pune has to offer. The climate is pleasant (as compared to Bombay), the people are nice (as compared to Delhi) and, on a lucky day, you might actually come across a rickshaw-wallah who is willing to take you where you want to go. Of course, on every other day, it will be the rickshaw-wallah who comes right across you, out of nowhere, from that tiny lane whose entrance was never suspected because it seemed to be blocked by the bhel-wallah under the peepal tree. Assuming, of course, that the "rick" was not taking a blind u-turn, since that's what they are seen doing most of the other times...

Now, we have already touched upon the public transport.. system, let's call it. Since Pune has developed radially (unlike Bombay's rather straight-line growth), the bus-routes are extremely confusing. A bus seemingly headed in the general direction uptown may actually turn downtown before you know it, causing you to scream at the conductor (that's the guy who gives you your ticket for the ride) to stop the bus. He screams back at you for not "asking before getting on". Meanwhile the driver has slowed down the bus, and you are expected to jump off in the oncoming traffic outside; leaving the conductor's question unanswered and your ex-co-passengers to face the music (he isn't called a conductor for nothing...). Of course, if you have survived the jump-off-from-a-moving-vehicle and manage to look up, you will see your bus taking another turn in the general direction uptown...

Asking for directions in Pune is actually quite simple though. A typical milestone is a branch of the "Bank of Maharashtra". Unfortunately, a Bank of Maharashtra really is a milestone, you'll find one for every two kilometres in the suburbs. Directions in the main city, the old part of the town, are quite simpler. You only need to know the difference between "Raviwar Peth" and "Shanivar Peth", need to know how they are differentiated from "Rasta Peth" or "Nana Peth", or, for that matter "Navi Peth". Being an old city, founded somewhere in the 17th century, Pune has its share of very old and famous temples, which also serve as interesting landmarks. They also exercise your tongue, with names ranging from "Maati Ganpati", "Modi Ganpati", "Patrya Maruti", "Khunya Muralidhar". The best part is, believe it or not, people actually know exactly where these places are, and the average road-side vendor will spell out the directions without looking up from his newspaper. Of course, he won't look up from his newspaper even if he were serving his customers...

Another breed of people who are aces at giving directions are cycle-wallahs. For the uninitiated, these are the blokes who ride bicycles to wherever they want to go. And riding a bicycle in Pune takes plenty of skill, let me tell you that. This is perhaps necessitated by rule # 1, which states that the cycle should not have brakes in working condition. The other rules are actually basically corollaries of this, and are made up and learnt as you go. I wouldn't advise you to start off your bicycling career in Pune...

What you can start off in Pune is riding two-wheelers. These are the vehicle-of-choice for the vast populace. Of course, in the streets of Pune, a two-wheeler is also the weapon-of-choice if you happen to have those leanings. There are more motorcycles ("bikes") and scooters, and their cousins, the scooterettes, found in Pune than anywhere else in the world. This may be a direct result of the aforementioned public transport. Perhaps its a conspiracy between the automobile producers and the Municipal transport corporation. Whatever it is, it provides a unique experience to the citizen, and makes a Punatic what s/he is.

You may want to drive a car in Pune once in a while. There is such a thing called adventure sports, after all.

The streets are much less fun these days, however, with the rickshaw's twice-removed cousins (they were actually put into production after the rickshaws, but they certainly seem two generations older...), the six-seaters, having been banished to outside the city limits (which change every day). I remember they were deported thus once before, but managed a successful comeback, only to be exiled again. Alas, the good old days are only a memory. You will find these outside the corporation limits, and since that's where most of the industry is (manufacturing, software, biotech, the works...), you might actually get to travel in one of these six-seaters sooner or later. That's when you'll realize that the Punatics are capable of the very British quality of understatement. I have once got on one such, after it already had ten other souls inside...

There are several other USPs for Pune. There are those that consider the city to be the "Oxford of the East". Having completed my education here, (and having never seen Oxford..) I wouldn't want to give my biased opinion, but I can certainly ascertain that Pune has always attracted students from all over the country, and also from other developing countries (mostly African). There must be several reasons for this, perhaps one being that the city is only about a hundred miles south-east of Bombay, but you'll never hear a Punatic admit this...

So, that's your Pune 101, presented by a typical Punatic. Oh, by the way, did I mention that close to Pune's airport, there is a famous world-class asylum for lunatics...